Bravery has been a big thing for me. People think I'm brave because I move all the time, took hard classes, went out with people I barely knew, and travel bunches. But let me tell you, that is not bravery to me. That's only bravery on the surface. To me, people who are brave let people in, let others get to know them personally, and don't reject love.
These are all things I'm prone to do.
I think the real kicker this past week -- what made me truly realize what I've been doing to myself -- was when I lost out on a great chance with a nice guy. The only person I have to blame for this is myself. He chose someone else. I know it's because I couldn't open myself up and take the risk. I couldn't stand being vulnerable.
My church gave me a little blue book the beginning of December, meant to give you food for thought throughout the Christmas season. The last sentence on Friday stopped me:
Sometimes I have to allow others to love me, without demanding that they fully understand me.
As long as I remind myself to be brave enough to be vulnerable, I'm hoping to make progress. The first step is admitting your problem, right?
How do you define bravery?
Accountable is my big thing and I'm glad I have my blog to keep me in check!!
ReplyDeleteYes, it's a great system to stay accountable! Looking forward to fully utilizing this blog for that. :)
DeleteI'm bad at letting people in once they've wronged me. It's not so much bravery as it is that I hold a bad grudge lol.
ReplyDeleteGood for you that you're working on improving an area you aren't happy with. That's a great resolution :)